Another lockdown, another series of feelings, thoughts and mind sets that are affecting energy deeply. The collective experience is palpable, distinct and real.
I walk the streets and it seems people are the same as they were 12 months ago. Magnification of suspicion, distrust, brokenness wash over the paths we share.
Conversations with friends and family seem to feel the same. The merry-go-round of frustration, anger, confusion and depletion is almost dejecting. Emotional and physical energy doleful. Happiness is almost non-existent.
Individually we are suffering according to what distinctive factor is missing during this time. Some suffering due to financial stress. Others due to lack of company, love and support. Struggle and suffering seems to be the only theme that feels normal at this time.
All these accounts do not need retracting. Contrary, they are all worthy, important to recognise, consider, process and discuss.
Yet, the sun shines, the birds sing, the wind blows and nature keeps in its flow. Makes me wonder….what is the lesson here?
How is it that the mundanity of nature at this time can be so pleasing for the birds, our dogs, pets and flowers? Yet for us as humans, whom have the luxury and abundance of all our 5 senses, we still struggle. It fascinates me…. We wrestle with flow and contentment even with this availability and more.
Don’t misunderstand me…I’ve been there, done that with all the struggle, confusion and depletion these lockdowns have to offer. Discontentment flowed and flows through my veins without permission.
Nevertheless, I’m DONE!
I wish to believe and choose differently.
Sometimes we’re not always given a choice, and lockdown is one of them. But our reaction is the power of self-choice.
I’m exhausted with buying into the fear, someone else's language, narrative and distinction. I’m drained by the media, the headlines and the external noise.
These are not the “life” classrooms I choose for myself. These are not the themes I choose to navigate my day or rule my thoughts.
Lockdown has taught me that opinion is a “matter of opinion”. Respectfully, opinions can differ.
Importantly, lockdown has taught me to trust myself. To listen to myself. To believe that there is not a “one size fits all” approach to this experience.
It has taught me that my capacity to do “good” even when I don’t feel “good” or see “good” can be a game changer in my physical and emotional energy. Connecting with others from afar through thoughts, gestures or kindness brought more to me than I could ever imagine. Smiling at a stranger, stopping to ask the essential worker at the grocery store how they are doing contributed to my inner peace, calm and harmony.
I learnt that making another a meal, writing a note, sending a random gift , even when I was not at my best, increased my happiness, mental health and wellbeing. My choice to help someone else aided me as much as it served the other. I discovered that this one factor was the key to my contentment during lockdown, providing me with the ultimate feeling of gratitude, satisfaction and inner rest.
My greatest lesson has been to take charge, build my own contentment, deal with my own inner voice and internal triggers. Be ok with others, even when they are at their worst or have differing opinions, beliefs and attitudes.
Connect, expand and luxuriate in the abundance that I have deep within myself. Know that I have a lot to offer even from a distance.
But most graciously, know that my learning at this time may be different to another's learning. Recognise that being kind to myself when the waves of restlessness, unhappiness and displeasure wash over me will do me a world of good.
And hold close to my heart the belief that the Sufi proverb kindly suggests, “this too shall pass”.